Tag Archives: fear

Zen & Then

Blue Bamboo Wallhanging

Here is the wall hanging as it stands at the moment. Seven feet high, and 1.3 ft wide. I have plans to add more detail and of course it will be mounted on bamboo dowels. I just love working on bamboo-it’s a very Zen experience.

The background is not really yellow as it looks here, although I think it looks good, and I wonder if I should add that. This developed into a wall hanging from a would be mural, so it can be removable. As in any creative project, it eventually comes together. Once the incubation is complete, then you just know!

The moon is not yet full, though already it shines brightly through my south window. Some strange happenings around here this week. The robins are gone gone gone-how quickly they leave the nest. They vanished two days ago. I was concerned they had fallen prey to the scavenger birds. Even if that was the case, nothing can be done about it now. I actually felt lonely without them, and I think the cats were even sulking, but probably for a very different reason. Apparently it only takes a couple of weeks to flight time from birth, so I am wondering if they moved somewhere they perceived to be safer.

The other thing that was odd, was someone-not mentioning any names-sent me an email forward about spiders in a bathtub last night. It was deleted without viewing, as I cannot bear to look at spiders. While tending to my chores today what do you think I spotted in my bathtub???

A glimpse from the corner of my eye revealed the largest spider I have ever seen in this town. I was terrified, seriously contemplating retrieving a neighbour to help me out. At one point I was armed with rubber gloves, a shoe and a broom, but eventually I boiled the kettle, pouring the boiled water into the tub until the intruder met his demise. It took everything I had to build up the courage to eliminate the problem.

Sunset GlowSeemed so foolish, yet the fear was real. What do you think happened here? Did the very thing I was afraid of cause it to appear? This seems to be about what fear can create-what it can manifest! My mental model of reality was distorted, obviously the thing cannot hurt me, so my reaction was out of proportion.

Here is a Steve Pavlina Podcast, which I listened to tonight, which you may find is worth having a listen to, especially if you have been struggling with fears and/or anxiety. We have had some amazing cloud formations around here lately. So I will leave you with the pleasant rosy image and wishes of wonderful full moon energy.

Society and Fear

Society and Fear

cafe beano2Walking down the street, lately I have noticed most people cannot look you in the eye.

Some do not even say hello in their own neighbourhood.

I could hear the phrase ‘fear based society’ echo through my brain.

Fear seems to dominate our society these days. I see it everywhere.

At the top of the list, fear of not getting your share, fear of terrorism fear of people, fear of death, fear of speaking or hearing the truth . . . the list is endless. I am speaking of this as a condition of the human race, from a cultural perspective, not as an over generalization.


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What I really am striving for these days, is to allow my spirit to paint freely, unconfined by rules. Who makes these rules anyway? We do. Limitations, or what we perceive as limitations, are set by ourselves. We can adapt when we have to, countless stories tell us about people who have been ‘handicapped in some way’, who have found a way to go full steam ahead, unhindered by what other people would consider handicapped.

For a brief moment yesterday, I found my self with two brushes on the go, one in each hand. The smaller brush for details was in my right and, and the larger glazing brush was in my left, and I found myself painting with both hands. I was amazed. This was a first. Completely engrossed in the moment, I had what I needed literally at my fingertips, without interrupting the flow by changing brushes.

My right hand, is dominant, yet I have developed a certain amount af ambidextrosity over the years. I have never thought twice about using both hands when playing my musical instruments, so why not painting? Improvisation requires taking risks, yet leads us to great discoveries about our art, as well as ourselves.

“Fear is the reason for making art. It is a means to freedom.”
(Ilya Kabakov)

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